Bar Fodder

I.

I wanna run naked across
Martha Stewart’s Hamptons Estate
My hairy ass
hanging revelie warmed by
Blue sky June sun.

I wanna run naked
through
Martha
Stewart’s
garden
braid tiny purple flowers
into my ass hair
twine a barberry crown
cut a single red rose to
place seductively
between my yellow
teeth.

I wanna run naked
through
Martha
Stewart’s
house
bake hearty peasant bread
knit a scarf
make doilies
leave black calling card
curlies
on the
fine
bones
chinas.

II.

I was running naked
across the posh grounds of
Martha Stewart’s estate
when she summoned
Jurgen the Afrikaan big game hunter
(On hand for a show on
the proper use and maintenance
of elephant guns)
and Jurgen darted my glorious
hairy ass from a long
500 yards.

Dizziness…Sleep…

They released me back
into my native habitat
this smoke stank gin mill
Fully clothed in Jurgen’s
cast off hunting jacket, shorts
and pith helmet
$500 in my pocket

And that my friends
is a very good thing…